9/30/2015 Friendship

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Facebook is a strange thing. I suppose to this generation, not so much, but I remember a time when friends were people you saw in live time, and not through social media. Back then we couldn’t even imagine that there would be such a thing as social media. I feel like Facebook has isolated us in more ways than it has united us. What is friendship being turned into I wonder? How many friends do we really have when life gets tough? I guess my definition of a friend and social media’s version of it do not exactly match. They never really have. I can’t count how many times I have discontinued my account only to start it back up again for this reason or that one. These questions run through my mind this morning.  This will be that last post that posts to Facebook. If you want to follow my blog please feel free. I truly am open to friendship from anyone. I don’t need to share their religion, opinions, politics or similar life circumstances to be a friend to someone and if those are requirements on their end I probably at some point won’t measure up to those standards. I can live with that. I really value honesty and objectivity and it is important to me that I am transparent with people and I really appreciate the same. I just feel like I need to cut ties with Facebook where this blog is concerned. Whether I have no readers’ or 30, it makes no difference to me. I write as a way of processing, growing and figuring it out. This blog is personal and while I am very willing to share those details with people that are searching out the deep questions, trying to understand their own struggles and grow past them, like myself, I don’t want to impose those things on folks that are not really interested. I want to help people to feel a little less alone and I’d like to feel the same. I guess Facebook can be seen as a form of coercion at times. I guess I get that. I don’t really get offended over what people post but I suppose some people do. I suppose we are all forced in one anothers “faces” beyond mere acquaintance and subject to opinions, politics, religion and controversy 24/7. I don’t want to be that to anyone so other than my “face” on Facebook and some funny memes from time to time, I will be moving on. I’d like you to stay but only if you truly want to. 🙂

My body is feeling very tired today. I did Pilates yesterday but I think my internal reaction to all the stress in the last few weeks has taken it’s toll. I really am trying to “Be Still” but it has been a struggle for me. I am not going to walk today. George is a bit prissy about getting his paws wet and it has been raining non stop for days. I am going to go grocery shopping with a friend and fill up the cabinet and fridge because they are looking rather empty. This week is Sukkot and the first year that we haven’t put up our Sukkah in the back yard in a few years. The drama over the past few weeks with our youngest son (former foster, now adopted child with severe emotional/behavioral issues) has simply been too much for us to muster the energy to do so. It makes me a little sad thinking about it but on the other hand you have to know your limits. That is how I got myself into many messes to begin with. I have not listened to that voice on the inside that said, “hey, slow down, you can’t do it all and sometimes you just need to stop for a while.” Now, I feel like I am given no option but to heed that voice because I have come to the end of my energy resources and our circumstances are dictating what does and does not to need to be done right now. So, I truly wish my friends celebrating the feast much joy and happiness. I join you in spirit and hope our circumstances are better next year.

Cheers!

April

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